“It is our attitude at the beginning of a difficult task which, more than anything else, will affect its successful outcome.” William James
The Harvard philosopher and psychologist William James once wrote that one of the most important discoveries made by his generation was that by changing our own attitudes, we can change our lives.
Changing attitude is a choice we all have and these choices can concern all basic situations of our daily life and can be frequent as much that we need.
Attitude plays an important role in everyone’s life and it is the foundation and support of everything we think and do and it is a key element in the process of controlling our own destiny and achieving mastery in our personal and professional life.
If we Want to Develop a Positive Attitude, we Need to Be Committed Enough to Work at it
Although everyone has an attitude, not everyone has the same type of attitude.
What we think about the most influences how we feel. What we think about ourselves, others and situations influence our attitude.
We are consistently moving in the direction of our most main thoughts. If our dominant thoughts are healthy and positive they result in a healthy and positive attitude. If our dominant thoughts are unhealthy and negative they result in an unhealthy and negative attitude.
Some individuals have optimistic attitudes that propel them along, helping them deal with challenges, overcome obstacles, and accomplish their objectives.
For example optimists (individuals with positive attitudes) are more successful than similarly talented people with pessimistic or negative attitudes, according to Martin Seligman, the father of modern Positive Psychology and noted psychologist at the University of Pennsylvania.
The modern Positive Psychology movement has been founded in 1998, and since then has attracted a large following, influencing leaders, business leaders and politicians across the world.
The cornerstone of this theory is the claim that external circumstances individuated as challenges make almost no difference to our happiness, as Seligman has explained, but it is our attitude that does.
The optimists rationally and logically look for and discover specific remedies to their challenges. They try new point of views, things and strategies and through the process of excursion they discover what works for them.
The pessimists, on the other hand, deduced without careful reasoning that they were the reason for their problems or unsuccess. They continue to do the same old things the same old way, and they arrive to deteriorate their self-esteem at cost to ”save” their attitude of pessimist instead of be focused on functional solutions because in the reality they don’t expect different outcomes for their efforts, but just unsuccess.
Monitoring our Attitude Allows us to Know in Advance what Inhibits and what Motivates us
The main problem in changing attitude is that often we allow our attitudes to be affected by the events we experience day-to-day. “life inflicts the same (difficulties) and tragedies on the optimist as on the pessimist, but the optimist weathers them better,” writes Dr Martin Seligman according to who mastering the process of taking control of our responses to the events we learn step by step how to maintain a positive attitude even when the events surrounding our life are not so positive and we can conquer the power we need to take charge of our life.
Improving attitude doesn’t necessarily require making a 180-degree turn. Most of us are not 100 percent positive or negative all the time. Developing and maintaining a positive attitude is by no means black and white: optimists have bad days and pessimists have good days.
Our attitude is our choice and external events pale in comparison to our inner power to choose a positive attitude. By choosing to change our focus from external influences and nourishing and turning in positive internal influences we can take control of our attitude and of our life.
Accepting the Responsibility for What we Choose to Focus on when Events Happen in our Life we can Change our Attitude.
Everyday we can commit ourselves to the 5 percent and 95 percent rule: Directing no more than 5 percent of your focus on what you don’t want and 95 percent on what we do want.
Learn to Develop a Positive ”Attitude Talk”
When we tell ourselves that we can’t handle something we tend to stop looking for solutions. It is the most automatic command that we send to our subconscious blocking our mind to proceed.
Stopping Negative Thoughts and Creating Habitually Positive Internal Dialogue can be a Self-Motivating Positive Attitude and a Help to Reduce Stress.
Self-talk for positive internal dialogue positive internal dialogue is what we refer to as “attitude talk.” Attitude talk is a conscious and directed way to talk to ourselves. Attitude talk has the power of ”overwrite” our past unconscious negative programming by erasing or replacing it with a conscious positive internal voice.
Attitude talk is different from affirmations because it is a friendly and silently space of confidence that we establish with ourselves.
We don’t need to convince our subconscious talking loudly, but we just need to start to create a real and positive connection with ourselves. In fact attitude talk is also used to increase self-esteem as well as optimism.
We unconsciously think and say many things that negatively affect our attitude. Some of the most popular statements we use as habit are “I’m Sorry” (when we are not sorry ) or “I Feel Sick” or “I am Broke” (when it is not true) creating a dissonance between what we say and what we think.
”Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.” Mahatma Gandhi
The words we choose affect our attitude and our attitude affects the whole of our life: monitoring our internal dialogue we can become even more aware of what we tell to ourselves: just recognizing if we are telling the truth or not. When we start to notice that we are engaged in a negative inner dialogue, just stop immediately and replace it with a positive dialogue. Just this little change in the attitude talk can create an enormous change in terms of physical and mental state and the energy in the words will give more power to impact our attitude in positive everyday more.
Author: Cristina Capucci